October 7, 2008

Aha my homies………………………………………

It’s been a long-a time-a coming, but boy, is it gonna come whole day or wat 😉 😉 😉 I know my last post marked our 61st Year of Independence, and since then, I haven’t found any time to free myself from the shackles of work, fun, wine, women and food – strictly in that order. I know I ought to be meeting you guys more often, and keep you entertained in your boring existence, but well, even superheroes need some time to rethink and reinvent themselves, right???

So what’s up since I’ve been missing from your entertainment schedule? Let’s see – Investment Banking has turned out to be the worst business on earth, and i-bankers are viewed with the same glance reserved for venomous rattlesnakes. India has gone on ahead with its nuclear Deal with the US and the Left has not only lost its hold over the Government, but has also said Tata to the Nano. Elsewhere, in other small news, Lehman Brothers filed for bankruptcy, and Merrill Lynch was acquired by the Bank of America. I wonder what they’ll do to the bull on Wall Street now – will they put “Sold” around its neck??? And as usual, we have some bombs exploding (it’s Delhi now), some terrorists being caught, some fleeing, some IT guy sending terror-mails (Why is it that only IT guys are caught sending these mails? Is it common knowledge that we are the only ones sitting idle on the face of the earth?)… And so on and so forth…

So you see, nothing inspirational, or rather sinspirational, was happening… And I was left with cursing myself for using the cheap washing powder on my costume, while the world blew up in flames. You know, it totally spoilt it, leaving blotches of lightened color, which makes it look as if it was pee’ed upon by all the kids at the day-care center. I was going through the same moral, emotional & physical battle with my conscience that Superman had with his when he found out that Lois Lane had stopped being telepathetic to him; that Spiderman had with his when he found out that Mary Jane had dropped him like a starlet drops a fat, balding unsuccessful producer for the smashing new actor on the block; that Batman had with his when he found out that Robin and Alfred were having an affair behind his back; that well, you get the drift don’t ya? No no no… I’m not talking about losing my girlfriend, all I’m saying is that I felt that the world didn’t need me anymore. That even I, the Superheroest of all Superheroes, deserves a normal lifestyle. And also, my mom had started thinking I was taking drugs when I started spending a lot of time in my locked room. That darned skin-tight costume took time getting in to and out of.

But then again, I had to come back. I couldn’t be so selfish. How can I let you live in peace, when your life can be made so miserable by the insanity and stupidity that I could inflict and impose upon you? It would be criminal of me to leave you looking so happy and gleeful. So well, here I am, in a better avatar, better costume and better make-up. And yeah, I promise you that this new costume won’t tear at the seams just like last time when I was flying around and caught an adult film being projected through a satellite, by way of my extra-infra-telemicroscopic vision. But I know you secretly enjoyed the view 😉 😉 😉 My new costume is made of a new material made of Lycra and rubber and is stretchable, elastic and tear-proof at the same time. So no more tearing due to natural projections 😉 😉 😉

So my homies, hope you had a nice time, coz you are in for a better time. After all, the world stands in need of some savior, some supernatural power, some sinspiration… 😉 😉 😉

Keep reading…


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